Would you remain in a violent and abusive marriage for love?

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September 15, 2016 by Levi Dominic

​You married someone you trusted, and you gave yourself to that person. How could it be that the person you trusted with your life now acts like the person who could take your life? 

Love and Trust

Love and Trust

A quick scan of the Internet reveals that Twenty-five percent of adult women say they have experienced violence at the hands of their spouse.. Men, too, can be victims of spousal violence. 

Eight percent report at least one such incident. Be it unpredictable rage or outright physical abuse, is it something you should accept and live with? 

Would you leave or stay with someone who abuses you? 

Here are the responses of some entertainment celebrities; 

I would walk away only if … — Belinda Effah, Actress 

I will never stay in an abusive and violent marriage. I won’t walk away but I would get separated from him and ask him to see a therapist to certify him fit, before I can return to the marriage. If after the therapy, he continues in his violent ways, I will walk away for good because he can kill. 

Nothing will make me stay — Adokiye, Singer 

Nothing will make me stay in a violent and abusive marriage. Most times, out of shame of being called a ‘divorcee’, we end up dying emotionally, spiritually, physically and otherwise. Your whole life is shut down because you don’t want to walk away. A large percentage of such marriage situations end up in disaster, some even leading to death. 

I have zero tolerance for domestic violence — Susan Zayat, Actress I can’t, I have zero tolerance for domestic violence. Even though it’s hard to face the truth, but being in such a marriage is not good. As a man, you can’t say you really value your marriage and simultaneously, disrespect and mistreat your wife. Even God doesn’t support it, because it might lead to death. I’ve come to realise that most people remain in abusive and violent marriages for reason like love, fear, feeling abuse is normal, embarrassment, low self esteem and so on. But as for me, I can never stay for any reason. 

The day he hits me, the marriage is over! — Evia Simon, Actress I don’t see myself as someone who will remain in a violent and abusive marriage. I can’t stand a boyfriend who is violent or abuses his girlfriend, how much more a husband. We are meant to be one soul in two bodies. I hate guys who lay their hands on women. They look like monsters to me. The day a man will raise his hand on me, that relationship or marriage is gone forever and he’ll also see the monster in me too. 

It’s not wise to stay in such marriage— Praise, Adeyemo, Media Personality 
It’s not wise to stay in an abusive relationship so you don’t end up losing your life. It means the person abusing you doesn’t love and value you any more. You lose a lot if you chose to stay; your self esteem and self-worth. 

No, she’s not the woman I married— Toni Fredricks, Actor The answer is No. As long as the woman you married is no longer the same, you have the right biblically to go away, leave this demon and go look for the person you married. But of course, there’s a standard which is God’s word. If you want to have a blissful marriage, know God’s word regarding marriage and never listen to human principles and experiences. 

I’ll try to stop it … — Bose Alao Omotoyosi, Actress I’ll try to stop it especially if kids are in the picture. 65% of such relationships do not start that way. Most times, they are triggered by a lot of factors. No man would hit a woman without being provoked (I’m not saying it’s right though). But a woman could prevent a man before it gets to that extent. So, the solution most times is not to walk away but to re-startegise. Keep quiet when you’re angry, instead of raising your voice. When you try your best to stop a man from hitting you and he refuses or derives pleasure from it, then the man is not ripe enough for marriage and doesn’t deserve a wife. Walk out!

……..Add your own view!  

VANGUARD

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